You'll want a bike, too, once you read this.
I want a beach cruiser. Nothing new because I'll paint it myself. Candy apple red with gold flecks that sparkle under sunlight. It will have black cherries with dark green stems hand-drawn on the wheel centers and a little black basket up front to carry whatever groceries, half-full bottle of beer, and/or drugs I've purchased that day or night.
I want to ride it and hear the un-oiled parts squeak like tweety birds following everywhere I go.
Squeet squeet. Squeet squeet. Squeet squeet.
And maybe on some days I'll carry an old tape recorder in the basket to record my bike so that when I'm at home, I can play it for visiting friends.
"Wanna hear my bike?"
When I was a kid I used to have a Huffy with a basket up front. I used to 'borrow' (take without permission) my mom's tape recorder. She used it in college but not anymore. I borrowed it to record music from my favorite movies, for example: 'The Three Amigos' when Dusty, Ned, and Lucky are singing around the campfire, the end-song to Mannequin (Nothin's gonna stop us now! by Jefferson starship), and the beginning to that show 'It's a living'.
I eventually broke that tape recorder one day while roaring down the street while rocking out to Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now.
No, bike. NOTHING will stop us..
I hit a speed bump.
The recorder fly out of the basket, did flips and backsprings into the air, and when I reached out in a fruitless effort to save it, it crashed to the pavement and shattered.
Anyway, about that bike. I want a black helmet like the guys on vespas wear, and I want it to say, "I'm ahead of you" or "drive it like you stole it" or "Can you take the heat?"
On the rear of the seat will be another message that reads, "I have nice eyes, too."
Oh, my dream bike.
Some day. Some day.
x
